July 22, 2023: Trimming instead of shaving. Life without razors and less porn consumption

22 July 2023. I cleaned the bathroom, did laundry, and emptied the dishwasher while still fuming about what happened with Philipp at karate. During a partner exercise, he knocked my glasses off. When I picked them up and looked at them, the frame was completely bent, and one lens had fallen out. I had to go home with my over three diopters for the rest of the day.

After hopefully cleaning the bathroom thoroughly, I went to an optician near Christuskirche and had my glasses repaired quickly and free of charge by a friendly salesperson. He didn't want any money from me but appreciated my 5-star review on Google Maps.

Apparently, my glasses had been slightly bent even before this accident, because after the repair, my right ear no longer hurt after wearing the glasses all day.

On my way to the library, I disposed of my razor. I had been toying with the idea of not shaving anymore, but today I decided to finally go through with it.

In the library, I somehow lacked the motivation to be productive, but at least I made a few digital 1% changes: I activated Night Shift on my MacBook as well as on my smartphone. Under Screen Time → Content and Privacy → Store restrictions, I disabled installing, buying, and deleting apps. Under "Content Restrictions," I unchecked all boxes. Under "App Restrictions," I disabled everything I didn’t use.

In the afternoon, I went to Hildesheim, where my mom picked me up and took me to Borsum. She was stressed out with Julien, as usual between those two. In Borsum, I made myself a spelt coffee, sat on the floor in the living room, and continued my 1% changes.

I got the idea of not using search engines anymore and instead using ChatGPT. However, I dismissed this idea because I couldn’t search for images there and ChatGPT couldn’t answer my technical questions.

In ScreenTime, I blocked social media websites to avoid the temptation of stalking women from Bumble who had linked their Instagram accounts in their profiles.

While blocking time-wasting, unnecessary websites, I asked myself: What about porn sites? I regularly visited them, even when I was still with Jule. In hindsight, porn had done more harm than good to my relationship, as I chose to escape into the porn world instead of working on our sex life. Moreover, I wanted to use my imagination and fantasize about having sex with people I had met in real life. My fantasies during masturbation were always very intense. Although it may sound somewhat esoteric, I believed that by doing this, I would manifest a real encounter with that person. When I did eventually meet them, they would feel more familiar to me. I decided to watch less porn from now on. Whether I could completely quit, I didn’t know.

1. I have found a way to manage my body hair by trimming instead of shaving. This saves me about 3 euros a month since I don’t have to buy razor heads anymore. Additionally, I no longer have skin irritations on my neck and have reduced my waste.
2. I am reducing my porn consumption.