Alexander Fufaev
My name is Alexander FufaeV and here I write about:

November 3, 2023: Reading body language live, micro-expressions and dry dabbing instead of dry rubbing

3rd November 2023. In the Conti Library, fourth floor. I'm feeling somewhat exhausted, drained. My eyes are red. Today at HanoMacke, I only had black coffee because there was no oat milk available.

I had no motivation to do anything, so instead, I turned on my hotspot and searched for black Merino socks without logos. I found them and ordered two pairs of Merino socks for 17 euros each at half past twelve. They will replace my toe socks, which I unfortunately don't like very much.

Just as I ordered them, someone walked past the shelves. I looked down the aisle, and it was the doctor who sat with Robert and me at the table a few days ago. I smiled at her. She smiled back with a "Hmm," looked at me with her blue eyes, and sat down opposite me at my table. I was reading a book about body language and practiced observing her body language.

She had headphones in her ears and was wearing a large black sweater, black pants, black socks, and white sneakers, as if she wanted to dress in matching outfits with me but didn't have black shoes. Her blonde hair was partly tied back into a ponytail with a black hair tie. Her face was slightly flushed. Perhaps she was stressed. She took out a tablet with a white stylus, her horse book, a white notepad with flowers on it, her large gray water bottle, and surprisingly, a calculator. Then she began writing and reading on the tablet.

Under the black sweater, she wore a gray top and a silver necklace around her neck. She wore a bracelet with silver rings, one on her index finger and one on her middle finger. On the other hand, she wore the same ring on her middle finger as last time, a silver ring with a black stone. She almost took it off when thinking and then put it back on. Unlike Anna, who also seemed to like wearing rings, she didn't have long nails, and they weren't painted. I liked that.

It's hard to interpret if she likes me. Because when she's not looking at her tablet, she looks past me. If I briefly glance at her without staring, she doesn't look back. Maybe she's thinking or shy. Every time someone walks by in the aisle, she looks in that direction. Occasionally, she yawns, just like I do.

She rolls up one of her sleeves, writes with one hand on the tablet, and supports her head with the other hand on her shoulder. When she takes a break, she places the hand with the pen between her fingers under her chin. If her phone vibrates, she briefly looks at it and then returns her attention to the tablet.

She read something on the tablet, spread the fingers of one hand, and shook her head. Something apparently didn't go as she had imagined. Then she scratched her head and pulled up her sweater.

At 2 p.m., I took a coffee break. I went to Netto and got myself a quark pastry, which I ate during my coffee. I also grabbed a Tik Tak, not sure why. It was a spontaneous decision, probably because I thought I would chat with the doctor today.

Walking with coffee in hand past the canteen, the library, and the benches, I looked around. Perhaps the medical student had gone out, also looking for me. I couldn't find her because she was still sitting upstairs on the fourth floor, as I later found out when I finished my coffee break.

As I sat back down and continued searching for merino clothing, a group of students passed by us, prompting her to turn away from the board and glance at them as they passed. Then she looked directly into my eyes for a second and a half and smiled. I smiled back. Her bright blue eyes, reflecting the light of the gray clouds, were like two small diamonds. Without her smile, I would have nearly frozen before those icy eyes.

We continued working. She leaned her head back and lifted her face to the ceiling. What did that mean? Then she stood up, took her phone, I looked at her, we looked at each other again, smiled at each other, and she walked away with her phone.

She returned at 2:50 p.m., just 10 minutes later. She leaned her arms on the table with her elbows and typed something on her phone, looking horizontally. Then she glanced to the side and seemed to be reading something on her phone. My goodness, I couldn't focus on merino wool anymore. The more I observed her body language, the more excited I became.

I briefly went to the restroom and noticed her legs were crossed. I also noticed something on the outside of her hand, as if she had written something on it and then smeared it.

She typed something on her calculator, perhaps calculating prices for horse accessories? Like Laura did back then. She held a note in one hand, looked around, moved her lips as if whispering something, and then put the note back. In her other hand, she held her phone. I don't know if she was thinking or just pretending.

It was already 4:30 PM and we hadn't made eye contact since. Occasionally, she played with her hair, wrapping it around her finger, but nothing else special happened.

Now, I decide to stay until 5:20 PM. If we have intense eye contact by then, I'll ask her how much longer she plans to stay.

It's now 5:15 PM, five minutes left. I'm leaving. Perhaps I'll wait outside briefly for the medical student, because if she likes me, she'll probably follow me. She glanced at me briefly and smiled.

It's 5:20 PM and I'm not ready to leave yet. I'll wait another five minutes. Then I'll slowly start packing, and if she looks at me while I'm packing.

It was 5:23 PM, I stood up and started packing slowly. Now I was looking at the clock too much. Occasionally, I glanced at her to see if she reacted. She focused even more on the tablet. But when I had everything packed and was about to leave, she lifted her head and said goodbye. That was a sign.

I approached her. She noticed me. I leaned towards her at the table.

"Hey! How much longer are you studying?"

"For a while longer, I have the state exams next month and reproduction is giving me a hard time right now."

"I was wondering why you were studying horse reproduction. I assume you're studying medicine?"

"Yes, medicine. And what do you study?"

"I studied physics. Not anymore though."

"Uh, physics? Sounds interesting," she said, not really enthusiastic.

We looked deep into each other's eyes and a brief pause ensued.

"Actually, what I wanted to ask you: Would you like to go out with me after your state exams?"

"That's sweet of you, but unfortunately, I have a boyfriend."

"Too bad. I was wondering the whole time if you were interested or not. You smiled at me occasionally, but mostly looked past me. I didn't know whether I should approach you or not."

"Oh, that's sweet. We'll definitely see each other again in the library."

"Definitely! We can also meet for coffee without it being a date. You can just Google me. Fufaev. F. U. F. A. E. V. Feel free to send me an email. Then we can have coffee together. But remember: It's not a date!"

She giggled softly.

"Take care," I waved to her and left.

It wasn't until I left the library that I realized I hadn't even asked for her name. I wasn't sad at all that she was taken. Maybe it was even for the better, because it would be awkward if Anna really was interested in me and just didn't have time for me yet. But it would be cool to be friends with a doctor. She seemed nice enough, and I could definitely learn a lot about medicine from her.

At Netto, I bought canned soybeans, peas, salad, peanut butter, an apple, and a banana, then took the bus home.

At home, I washed my hair because it was very greasy. I forgot that I didn't want to use hot water and ended up washing my face with it too. Afterward, I had so many flakes in my beard. It was terrible. I researched and found out that cold water also removes fat from the body. But warm water removes even more.

By the way, I came across a habit that I've been doing wrong. I rubbed my hair and face dry. That's a fatal mistake because after contact with water, hair and skin are more sensitive. Instead, I should pat myself dry. I'll make sure to do that from now on.

Then a brilliant idea came to me: What if I didn't dry myself at all? For example, I could just pull my T-shirt over my wet body or let my upper body air dry. I rarely shower anyway. This would have the advantage that I wouldn't need to rely on my towel, and it would solve my current biggest problem in terms of minimalism: the odor that quickly develops on the towel after repeated use. To get rid of the smell, I have to waste a lot of baking soda. With this idea, I wouldn't need a towel anymore. The only question is: What would be the health consequences for me if I were to implement this idea?

Then I made salad for tomorrow and for today. I ate the salad and listened to Bodo Schäfer's affirmation on wealth. Then I ate peanut butter and watched videos about microexpressions. I want to learn how to read people better, understand them better. This will help me later in relationships and with women.


Learning: I should pat dry my hair and skin instead of rubbing them dry to try to reduce my hair loss.