I am Hormone-Infested

May 20, 2022, it was a Friday. The weather forecast had predicted a storm for today. When I arrived at the station and saw Mara standing on the steps in the distance, I was bubbling over with happiness. Even the sun came out of the clouds. I could see Mara smiling from a distance. The sunlight reflected off her hair and made her shine like an angel. The closer I got to her, the wider my smile grew and the more joy I felt in my heart. A long, deep embrace followed.

"Let's go to the park and soak up the sun while it's still there," she said after we had hugged.

In the park, sitting on a blanket brought by Mara, basking in the sun, we talked about the past week, the progress of my master's thesis, her upcoming exam period in epidemiology, her travel plans to Bratislava next year, my phone calls with Jule, and about us. During our conversation, the wind blew dark clouds over us, and from one moment to the next, it started to rain. So we headed to her place.

At Mara's, we prepared a salad with millet that she wanted to take for a birthday party tomorrow, and a part of it was meant for us. While eating, she told me about her conflict with her mother, who had previously constantly exploited her financially. Once her mother asked Mara for money, and when Mara refused, her mother cut off contact with her. I suggested that she give it another try, approach her mother, and suggest spending a day together. She accepted my suggestion.

After dinner, we both sat on the sofa in the living room, cross-legged, close to each other, and looked at each other. As we gazed into each other's eyes, it became clear to me that I was head over heels in love with Mara. I had never been so in love in my life as in this moment. And the beautiful thing was, this feeling of love was reciprocated by Mara. It was unmistakable in her eyes, slowly exploring every part of my face. Her smile, which she bestowed upon me, and her gentle kisses she gave me in between as we sat there.

"I've prepared a few questions that have accumulated over the weeks and that I would like to ask you. May I?" I asked her.

"Sure, go ahead!" she replied.

I took my phone out of my pocket and opened the notes with my questions.

"What was your favorite subject in school?"

"Which experience was so beautiful that you would like to experience it again?"

"What is your biggest fear?"

"What is your biggest dream?"

...

"Sasha, I want you to answer the questions too."

"Oh, okay, let me think for a moment."

A loud thunder interrupted our questioning briefly. Silence ensued. Thunder rumbled again. It was evident from Mara's expression that she liked the thunder as much as I did. While listening to this natural spectacle, I started to stroke her bare calf, protruding from her jeans as she sat cross-legged. Her calf wasn't as smooth as last time. This time it had slightly stubbly hairs. Somehow, I liked this imperfection of the real Mara even more.

She closed her eyes and leaned back on the sofa, wrapping her legs around me. I lay on top of her and kissed her neck. She smelled so good again.

“What's your favorite sex position?”

“We've had it before, but come on, I'd love to show you again,” I replied, holding out my hand to guide her to a more comfortable place for this, her bed.

We were very sweaty afterwards. Afterwards, I went to take a shower. While I soaped myself up with my lemon-scented shower gel, Mara stood completely naked leaning against the sink, watching me spread the gel over my body. I washed myself off with ice-cold water - something I would never normally do if I were alone. Mara handed me a towel and got into the shower with me. She gave me two kisses on the lips before I went out of the shower into the living room to put on my clean underpants and a T-shirt. I then lay down on the sofa and waited for the cute kitten, as I liked to call her when I cuddled her and she loved it.

A little while later, she arrived, wearing just a bra and red panties.

“Let's watch a movie,” Mara suggested, tying her hair into a bun.

“I'd love to, do you know which one?”

"I made a note of the movie Tenet the other day. I'm sure you'd like it. It's also about physics.”

"Oh, how cool. I'd love to!”

I never said no when a movie had something to do with physics.

After she had started the movie on her laptop, she lay down on the sofa with me, in my arm, on my shoulder. I kissed her on the forehead and head. The movie was very confusing and we paid little attention to the content. Instead, we concentrated on each other and just stared at the laptop screen. I stroked her arm and kept giving her kisses on every part of her face. It felt like we were happy together. When the movie was over, we continued to lie quietly snuggled up on the sofa.

“What will happen to us when Jule returns from England?” Mara asked me an unexpected question that was also on my mind.

"I don't know. Have you ever heard of polyamory?”

"Of course. I've even read a book about it. It would be interesting to have an experience like that. Why don't you ask Jule what she thinks?”

“Good idea, I'll ask her the next time we speak on the phone,” I assured her, my mind still struggling with the complexity of the situation.

A brief silence spread between us as I gently stroked her forearm.

“Is what we're experiencing actually love, or are we just hormone-addicted?” Mara asked me thoughtfully.

"I am definitely hormone-addled. But the effect of the hormones is strong enough to love you more than Jule at the moment,” I said spontaneously, feeling a mixture of confusion and uncertainty about what I had just said.

Mara snuggled into my shoulder even more.

I got an oppressive feeling. It was so oppressive that I started to cry silently. A tear slid down my cheek and fell directly onto Mara's forehead. She looked up at me and I could see tears in her eyes too. We hugged each other tightly.

Over the course of the evening, as my jokes lifted the weight off our shoulders and we started laughing, we moved to Mara's favorite position against the wall. She particularly liked this position because all parts of her body could be touched and she could rub her clitoris against me. After sex, we brushed our teeth, aired the room and then went back to bed. We fell asleep sometime around three in the morning.

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