November 12, 2023: Rapid drain on my social battery at casting and the reason why
November 12, 2023. Sunday. I woke up around 9 o'clock, cleaned the bathroom, and vacuumed. Vanessa went on vacation. While I cleaned the bathroom, my legume mixture was cooking on the stove. I thought Lina wasn't home because she went away for her birthday yesterday. But she seemed to have come back last night. I felt embarrassed when I noticed, as I occasionally had soliloquies and then loudly farted in the hallway. She was as quiet as Claudia from my old shared flat. I wouldn't have expected that from her.
Afterward, just before 11 o'clock, I took the bus to Café Kopi and met Robert on the bus, who was on his way to the library. He said he was getting a latte at the 24 Grad Café and then continuing on. We briefly talked at Kopernikusstraße and then I went into Kopi. I got myself an almond cocoa and a vegan Black Forest cake.
To my left sat a young blonde woman with short hair tied into a ponytail. She picked up a newspaper from the table and drank a tea with oranges and ginger. My heart began to race. I became restless and got butterflies in my stomach.
A man next to me asked for the WiFi password with a French accent. I thought it was "Hannover." But no. His phone displayed an error message in French.
I stood in line at the counter to ask for the password and to get the same tea as the young woman. Another man also asked the cashier for the password. I called out to him:
»And did you get in?«
»Yes.«
I asked him for the password. He said "Hannova."
I briefly went to the Frenchman next to me and typed it into his phone. It worked.
As I lined up again, the young woman stood in front of me. She had joined an older woman with short blonde hair and glasses, and her pink hoodie said "eye-able.com." It seemed to be about web accessibility. Now I could observe the young woman more closely. She wore a black top, light jeans, and burgundy boots. A keychain hung from the belt loop of her jeans at the waist. She wore round earrings, and her voice was quite deep for a woman, and she spoke very quickly. The deep voice and fast speech, as well as the fact that she didn't even look at me, I took as an excuse not to approach her. Shortly before 1 PM, the two left.
Jan arrived at 2:25 PM, 10 minutes late for the apartment viewing. He was about as tall as I am and a total nerd. Right after at 3 PM, Clara came. We liked her better.
Afterward, my social battery was depleted. I felt somewhat exhausted. I took a walk and found a possible reason for my empty social battery. I ignore many things or get easily distracted. That stresses me out because then I think I didn't listen properly but pretend like I did. And as soon as the conversation partner is silent and expects a response or reaction from me, but I can't react because I didn't listen properly, it stresses me out again. I then depend on the reaction of a third person who hopefully listened. I NEED TO LEARN TO LISTEN BETTER so that my social battery doesn't drain so quickly.
At the train station, I bought myself a muffin, a chocolate bun for tomorrow, a bagel with tomatoes and mozzarella, and a white bun with cheese, tomatoes, and lettuce. I ate the last two in the kitchen.
After that, in my room in front of the laptop on my mattress, I read the book "Essentialism." Actually, I want to get used to sleeping on the yoga mat. To make a small progress, I decided from today on to sit not on the softer mattress, but on the yoga mat or even on the wooden floor. This way, my body will slowly get used to the harder surface. Eventually, I can sleep on the yoga mat too.
I had 10 minutes left until downtime. I used to always think: Oh no, the laptop is about to shut down, and I have nothing to do except lie in bed. But this time, I looked forward to it. Because I learned from the book "Essentialism" that taking time for doing nothing is enormously important. Great personalities like Isaac Newton or Bill Gates deliberately took time for this downtime of the brain. I already knew before that doing nothing is important, but reading this book made it even clearer to me.
When the clock struck 9 PM, I closed the laptop, brushed my teeth, and chopped a salad for tomorrow. Then I lay down in bed and fell asleep before I could let my thoughts run free. Tonight, I dreamt of a spider trying to crawl into my ear.
Learnings:
- The most likely reason my social battery drains so quickly is poor listening.
- I should get used to working at home not on the mattress but on the yoga mat. Then I can learn to sleep on the yoga mat faster.
